Is God Sovereign When I Have a Panic Attack?
I had one recently and I have some thoughts...
A few weeks ago I was driving to where I teach part-time at college and seminary when I noticed my pulse felt really fast. I was commuting on I-20 and drinking my morning coffee. But, I noticed my heart rate was over 100. While that’s not concerning, it isn’t normal for me. So, I put the coffee down and decided I wouldn’t drink anymore. I figured that would be the end of things. Then I sat down at my desk and started going over my lecture notes when I was hit with some all too familiar physical signs of a panic attack. It had been 8 years since I had experienced those symptoms, but I thought here I go again… I instantly started thinking about the weeks of turmoil this caused 8 years ago. I was determined not to let that cycle repeat itself.
You see I’ve been leading a ministry called Regeneration at my church and I went through the program last year. It has given me some helpful tools (scripture and relationships) to lean on in times of difficulty. So this time, in the middle of the panic attack, I found myself praying to God for relief. I found myself asking others to pray for relief. In that moment I was thinking to myself, surely this isn’t what God wants for me. But with some reflection, a few days later, I began to wonder if God was sovereign in the middle of my panic attack. You see in the middle of a panic attack it really doesn’t feel like I’m in control. In fact it feels like everything is out of control and just spiraling into chaos, pain and uncertainty.
Scripture Claims God is Sovereign
We know this. Scripture claims in many places that God is sovereign. We read Romans 8:28, and quote it to friends who lose loved ones or lose a job…
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. (Legacy Standard Bible)
Then there is Matthew 10:29-31…
Are not two sparrows sold for an assarion (a few dollars)? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. 30 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows.
You see in that time of panic, I was thinking: “Surely I’m worth more than one of those sparrows. Surely I deserve better than going through a panic attack. God wouldn’t allow me to suffer with a racing heartbeat with sweat all over my face while I’m just sitting at a desk working would he?”
Look at Jesus
If Jesus was truly fully God and fully Human (and I think that he was), then did he ever experience anything like this in his humanity? Because of who Jesus was, he provides the model for living as a human being.
So, think about the prayer scene in Gethsemane before the cross (Luke 22:44).
And being in agony He was praying very fervently, and His sweat became like drops of blood, falling down upon the ground.
So Jesus dealt with some pretty severe angst. Now, I’m not claiming Jesus had a panic attack. I cite this text as an example that Jesus as God in human form went through difficulties that caused him great stress. Stress and pain are human experiences. And if Jesus was not spared from these experiences, why should I be spared from them?
Prosperity Gospel or Health & Wealth Teachings
To be sure there are movements which claim that if people just follow God correctly, then they will not face trials. In other words, obedience = blessing/prosperity, and disobedience = trials. Yet, that I’m convinced that isn’t the claim of the scriptures. In fact, the book of Job counterbalances this sort of Prosperity Gospel in the first two chapters. Satan had the following interaction with God, suggesting that Job only followed God because he liked the blessings that came from following God (in other words obedience = blessing).
Then Yahweh said to Satan, “Have you set your heart upon My servant Job? For there is no one like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, fearing God and turning away from evil.”9 And Satan answered Yahweh and said, “Does Job fear God without cause?10 Have You not made a hedge about him and his house and all that he has, on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land.11 But send forth Your hand now and touch all that he has; he will surely curse You to Your face.”
But God countered this claim by allowing Satan to cause the trials to play out. In other words, trials do not always stem from disobedience. Job lost family and health. Yet Job did not lose faith. While Job certainly wasn’t perfect, he provided a foreshadowing of how Jesus would handle trials.
It also turns out that Jesus was asked a question somewhat along the lines of this disobedience=punishment type of thinking. Jesus was asked the following in John 9:2-3
And His disciples asked Him, saying, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?”3 Jesus answered, “Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this was so that the works of God might be manifested in him.
Jesus’ response indicates that trials in life (and bad health) do not always stem from disobedience. So the ideas from the Prosperity Gospel or Health & Wealth teachings are clearly countered in scripture even though we can find a multitude of these kinds of teachings online. The implication of what Jesus said is that trials give rise to the works of God.
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Or perhaps:
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So… Is God Sovereign in the Middle of a Panic Attack?
Yes, but not in the way that I would have answered a few weeks ago. In the middle of a panic attack, I am personally tempted more than any other time to abandon the idea that God is in control. And yet, Regeneration ministry has taught me:
13 No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man, but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)
In my situation with a panic attack, the way of escape provided was three-fold. Again, these are things I’ve learned through Regeneration. First, I had scripture to remember about what to do in my moments of anxiety:
Philippians 4:6-7: Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
1 Peter 5:6-7: Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
Second, I had plenty of other believers to turn to for support. I quickly fired off a text to about 7 guys asking them to pray for me and explaining my circumstances. They prayed immediately. I called my wife and she calmly reminded me of the above scriptures. These people also followed up with me in the days after to make sure I was OK, and continued to let me know they were praying.
Third, I actually talked to my doctor immediately. Instead of freaking out and going to the hospital, I called my doctor. He gave me some quick instructions to help with the physical symptoms. I then followed up with an appointment the next day and addressed the physical symptoms further.
Yes God is Sovereign
From my experience with my recent panic attack, I learned that God really does cause all things to work together for His good (Rom 8:28). But his view of the timeframe for those things is a lot longer view than mine. He does not always operate by giving immediate blessing for obedience and/or immediate punishment for disobedience. He runs the world by His wisdom, not by some formulaic rules based system that governs the outcome. I’ll let Jesus words in John’s gospel say it in another way:
John 16:33 These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.
So, I don’t get the answer that I want. I don’t get a life free of troubling circumstances, or even free from illness. But I do get an answer from the scriptures. Instead of my way, I get a life of experiencing God working in and through me in this world. I have a new appreciation of Romans 8:28:
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.
And, I also get the promise of heaven. I’ve learned that is enough.
More About Me…
I am the Discipleship Pastor at Greenwood Baptist Church in Weatherford TX. We have about 1500 people on campus for Sunday Worship. Size can create discipleship challenges and it’s my job to address those challenges. I also teach Old Testament at the College and Seminary level for fun.
Sometimes I write about Bible study, like this:
Interpreting Biblical Proverbs and ChatGPT
July 20, 2023
The Book of Proverbs is a collection of wise sayings (proverbs). Some proverbs are a single verse and others carry the same them/idea across several verses. First you need to figure out if this proverb is a single verse or multiple verses and then separate it out to interpret on its own.
And then other times I like to write about practical Digital Tools that I’m using in my church setting to create systems to ensure that people have the opportunity for discipleship. Like this:
Fall 2024 Digital Playbook for Group Bible Studies
Aug 26
I’ve written about the importance of an onboarding strategy to get people involved in group Bible studies before. This time I want to talk about tools we are using for our Groups ministry this fall.